Everyone’s interpretation of what happiness is differs depending on the individual. There are some generalities between certain demographics that tend to be true and it’s those generalities that I would like to address. In my opinion, the modern woman appears to be less fulfilled than the women that came before them.
Over the past couple of years, I’ve been more interested in the social dynamics between men and women and trying to understand what makes most women tick. What are their motivations? What are their long-term relationship goals? Most importantly, what is the modern woman’s relationship strategy? This is a very complex topic that I can’t fully address in one article but I will give a summary analysis as to what I’ve noticed.
The largest factor that is affecting the happiness of women is the bad messaging they are receiving throughout popular culture that dictates their strategy for dating & their viewpoints on what a modern relationship should look like. Most women want to get married and have children, yet they are told to not be goal oriented in their objective. There is this widespread belief that they can wait until their 30s or even 40s to start this kind of life, which is hypothetically true, but what they don’t understand is that it makes their likeliness of success plummet the older they get for a variety of reasons.
The modern woman is told that she is not to sacrifice her 20s for anyone else but herself. Her 20s is her liberation from childhood and she is to live as wild & free as she desires. She is to reap the rewards of her youth and peak beauty with short term sexual attention. If she chooses not to live promiscuously, then she is likely following the direction of becoming more astute in her career or constantly seeking higher learning as a method to improve herself.
What this career woman doesn’t understand is that the higher she climbs the corporate ladder & increases her economic potential, the smaller her selection for men will become because most women are unwilling to date a man that is less accomplished than she is & most men don’t want to date a high earning career woman due to her exhibiting more masculine traits than the average woman. Also, because she is focused on her career, her partner takes a back seat and this increases the likeliness of the relationship failing.
Women in their 20s will probably tell you that they want children and marriage but simultaneously they will tell you that they are too young for a serious relationship. They are extremely conflicted between what they naturally desire & the modern social demand for independence from men. In order for her to have a successful marriage, she needs to find a way to coexist with men, but at the same time she feels that men are optional.
These young women have turned a relationship with a man into a struggle for power and an unnecessary sacrifice of her independence. The idea of depending on a man, for them, is as fearful as going to a circus when you’re afraid of clowns. Because of this, if they are going to relinquish power, they want to savor their independence as long as possible before caving into, allegedly, giving up her power.
Let’s say she is in her 20s and she wants a serious relationship. Her difficulties with finding a secure & masculine man are due to her poor strategy of finding men or understanding what a good long-term partner is. Part of the reason that many women have a hard time selecting a man for long-term success is because they don’t value the honest opinion from their fathers and brothers.
There was a reason that previous generations of women would bring their potential partners home to meet their parents. Part of the reason was for their father to vet the man & expose any potential bullshit that his daughter is blind to because she’s operating with her emotions while her father is operating on logic. The father & brother are the only men in a woman’s life that isn’t trying to sleep with them, making their advice even more valuable than the so-called male friend that is waiting in the weeds to get a chance to cash in on his patience.
Because of this missing valuable information, many women don’t understand that their ability to get sexual attention does not translate into long-term relationship attention. Yes, men love a woman’s body and Instagram is filled with large breasts & enormous posteriors but that does not mean that men take these women seriously for a relationship. Flashing your body gives a signal to men that you are promiscuous, even if you aren’t. At most, it tells men that you love the attention from other men when you are supposed to be loyal to him, making you a high risk of failure in a long-term relationship.
Women are free to dress & behave as they want but if they want a man to take them seriously for marriage and to be the mother of his children, he needs to ensure that this woman is a woman of some modesty and she is not advertising herself for a new male suiter. It is why men aren’t lining up to marry strippers & porn stars; these are high-risk women for a relationship despite their beauty and sexuality.
Part of the bad messaging is the level of importance beauty plays into them having a successful relationship. Yes, men love beautiful women however if that’s all you are, then we will probably move on. A woman’s beauty should be used to entice a man, but it’s not to be used to keep a man. If you are beautiful but offer nothing else in the relationship because you lack substance, then it is no question as to why you are single. It is the equivalent to a man that is good-looking but is unemployed. A woman’s social media account helps a well-adjusted man see how vain his potential partner is and it plays a part in how serious he will take her. Once again, her strategy of publicly flaunting her sexuality makes her invisible to men who would be suitable for her long-term wants.
The sexual attention in addition to participating in this new found sexual liberation has also contributed to women creating children without the promise of a relationship. There are men that will lie, manipulate & make promises for sex and too many young women fall for these fallacies. The old attempt to protect a woman from singularly raising a child was marriage but now we have set upat-home the world for single mothers to have a softer landing when they fall into this circumstance. Nevertheless, most women don’t dream about raising a child alone. Notably, most women don’t realize the negative impact that being a single mother has on their dating prospects. Right or wrong, most men don’t want to raise another man’s child & this decreases a woman’s pool of quality men.
Lastly, we have devalued what most women find to be fulfilling. We now live in this upside-down world where we shame women who want to be stay-at-home mothers by labeling them as weak but if she wants to be a worker-bee for a corporation that will discard her to satisfy their bottom line, then she is somehow empowered. Generally speaking, women do not derive the same pleasure from working as men do but we are forcing women to become economic earners to fight against “the patriarchy.”
The profile of the unhappiest demographic in America is a woman who is 42 years old, unmarried, without children, making less than $100,000 & working in a professional position (according to a survey – Link to Article). We have been training women to become more like men and they are miserable because of it. They believe they can have sex without attachment like men can and it results in them becoming emotionally scared. Some women believe that if they protect their independence, then they can never be hurt by a man, but in the end, they become miserable as they grow old & die alone.
The mating strategy for the modern woman is far more complicated than previous generations and it’s resulting in a generation of unhappy, jaded & defeated women. Despite this, women can change their failing results & improve their happiness within relationships.
First, women need to have a clear objective when it comes to relationships at a younger age. If you know that you want to get married, then you need to take advantage of your increased options when you are at your peak attraction & while you are likely less jaded due to not having years of failed relationships. If you find a man that you are considering for a relationship, you need to set a timeline for when you will receive the outcomes that you desire. Far too many women stay with men for years because they are good boyfriends but they have no desire to be husbands or fathers.
Women need to treat their pursuit for a suitable long-term relationship as serious as they do their Bachelor’s degree. Ask people who are in successful marriages for advice and humble yourself because you don’t know everything (no one does). Dare I say that you should study men and find out what men want in order to keep their attention.
Women also need to understand that just because men are the ones that approach, it doesn’t mean that women don’t do any work in the process. If the goal is marriage & children, put yourself in an environment where men who want marriage & children hangout. If you want a high earning man, associate with people who know them. Prince charming is not going to knock on your door one evening and ask to put a slipper on your foot.
Lastly, women need to embrace being feminine again. For some reason, we have made classic feminine traits appear as “weak” but in actuality, women who embrace their femininity have so many advantages when they utilize it in a healthy manner. Men love a feminine woman, much like women love a masculine man. Embrace your natural femininity and you will be rewarded with a man that will gladly help to supply you with the lifestyle that you wished for.